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Question to the expert: despotism in a relationship

Why is a caring and delicate partner at times suddenly seem to turn into his evil twin brother-Hamit, humiliates, controls without measure? What is the reason for this behavior, explains the family psychotherapist Lucy Michaelyan.

“I have problems with my young man. At first he tried to control me (he admitted that he had read the mail, but I closed my eyes), was very jealous. Recently, he began to humiliate me with quarrels (curses obscenities), tried to show that he was the main one in everything and everywhere. He is 6 years younger than me, I am a person who has taken place, but I’m not married. He began to reproach me with this too. When everything is fine with us, he is caring, gentle, but his behavior scares me. Does such a relationship have a future? Or further assault is possible? What is the reason for this behavior?”

Lucy Michaelyan, Family Psychotherapist, employee of the Institute of Practical Psychology and Psychoanalysis:

“Perhaps his aggressive behavior feeds on the fear of losing you and self -doubt. And when he feels necessary and able to give you something, he shows care and tenderness. I think these differences in experiences are associated with the signals that he receives from you, and with what they mean for your young man. Relations – Facular Dance: The emotions and behavior of one partner determine the answers of another, and vice versa. In problem situations, it is better to start with understanding yourself, although it is more natural to direct attention to the partner, because it is his behavior that upset and bothers. Listen – what emotions in a relationship with him you https://pilgrimage.in.ua/zarvanytsya-onlajn-vseukrajinska-proscha/ usually experience that you think what you want to do, what you are doing in reality? What is the starting mechanism for the quarrels? What are the most difficult moments for you and what exactly? How much the way of handling the emotions that you find at yourself is characteristic of you in what relationships happened or something similar? What can happen if you share your observations with a young person? Is there a chance that there will be a calm and substantial conversation between you on the topic that excites you both? After all, there really is a risk that emotional instability and unsafe, it will swing the relationship and destroy the good that connects you with each other ”.

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